24 Jun, 2021 07:35 PM

if your boyfriend was a jerk will you give him a second chance?

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24 Jun, 2021 07:35 PM

I think that the older we get the less likely we are to accept the behavior of jerks.  At this stage in my life, the answer is definitely "No".  It  might have been different when I was younger.  Now I realize that life is too short and precious to settle for something less than you deserve.

24 Jun, 2021 07:36 PM

ha  my boyfriend is a jerk many days of the week and we've been together for 3 years. Only you can decide what level of jerk you can handle. Face it, everyone's a jerk at somepoint in a relationship. Even you will be a jerk sometimes. It all depends on the offense and how many times he's done it. Is he willing to try to not do some of these things.

24 Jun, 2021 07:36 PM

It depends on if he did something that is unforgivable like being violent, either physically, verbally, mentally is not acceptable. 

If he was inconsiderate person then it depends on how long you dated and how long he made you suffer.

If it is about you seeing him (I do not mean you starting the relationship up again),so he can give you your heart back then by all means. 

You may be asking the question because what you mean is that you need to just see him to reclaim part of yourself that you gave to him as a gift. 

You need to see him so that that horrible yearning will stop and never bother you again.

 You need to see him so that you do not see his face in every stranger who has his features.

You need to see him so you can stop jumping every time you come across his name in print or in conversation. 

So if it is possible do it but, have your head and heart in the right spot. It may save you from wasting time because of incomplete closure. 

It takes maturity and no game playing to acheive proper closure so know what you are going into. Very rarely does getting back together work out, but proper closure can have a life impact.

Remember if he was violent IT IS A DEFINITE NO!

The She Beast


24 Jun, 2021 07:36 PM

If he is really a jerk, he is unlikely to change -- so dump him now.

On the other hand, if he is not a jerk, but acted like a jerk once -- then he might learn from his mistakes.

You don't say what he did.  If he said something inappropriate, he might learn -- and you might want to give him a second chance.

If he slept with someone else -- run.

If he hit you or threatened you -- run fast.

24 Jun, 2021 07:37 PM

No, because if he is a jerk now, he'll be a bigger jerk later.  Don't waste your time.  Trust me, I wasted 4 years with a jerk and you don't want to know what it finally took for me open my eyes and leave.  Just know you deserve better.  If a guy really cares about you he will never (or at least rarely) be a jerk to you.