23 Jun, 2021 11:57 AM

How do you make the most of your college experience?

I'm a junior in college, I go to school 3 hours away from home. I haven't made hardly any friends here, I've made alot of "acquaintances" you could say, but no true friends. I'm ok with that because I have an amazing boyfriend of 1.5 years, and I do everything with him. He's my best friend here. I work here and I'm involved in a few clubs, but I don't have "friends" in those. I still just feel like something is missing. I pictured college to be so different then what it actually is. I'm pretty shy around people. I can be outgoing when I have to be, but I have hard time just flat out being myself around certain people. It's hard to make alot of "close friends" at college. I'm trying to make the most of it, I'm involved on campus, and I'm going to study abroad winter semester. I just feel like something is missing, and I don't know what, any suggestions? How do you make the most of your college experience?

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HE
23 Jun, 2021 11:58 AM

Just be yourself and study. You will make friends naturally and by meeting people in your classes. Why not start a study group or join a study group? You are the only one who will decide how to get what you want out of school and out of life.
Yes there is more to college than just studying but if you want more you will have to get out and look for it. Get more involved and speak up more. Be more sociable if you are looking to make friends.

And for me, true friends are hard to come by. You will meet alot of people before you meet one genuine one. I really cant tell you what is missing from your life, i guess only you would know. Maybe you should also consider taking up a healthy hobby too. Like Martial Arts or sports, or even a language-whatver floats your boat.

How about you talk to your boyfriend and ask his opinion too. He knows you well and maybe he can give you an honest opinion of what else you could get out of life that you're not right now. I hope this helps. You should talk to people that know you and your personality well. You will get better answers.

CA
23 Jun, 2021 11:58 AM

I think you are very fortunate to have an amazing boyfriend. College is a pretty competitive place depending on your major. Sometimes people who seem to be your friends are just trying to one up you so you need to be careful and not allow yourself to become disappointed in humanity. It sounds selfish but if I were you, I would not try to be Miss Popularity, just try to be all you can be through your own hard work and effort. You may not seem to have that entourage around you but you will be finding out what you are made of and not just how well you can get the low down on campus gossip. After all college is just as much about book learning as it is self-discovery. In the end, people will admire you for your tenacity, determination and strength of character. As the saying goes, "it is lonely at the top." Pick your poison and go for it!

LI
23 Jun, 2021 11:59 AM

Well I know you said you are involved in clubs, but what about going to activities hosted by your school on the campus. You could go to those and possible meet a few people. Or if there is a person in one of your organizations that you think would be cool to hang out with ask them if they would like to accompany you on an activity that you are involved in. Also if you are tired of staying in your room studying go to the bar/club every now and again, just make sure school is your main priority. You may meet people there that know what fun things are going on on campus. I am not the most outgoing person either but I made life-long friends when I was in school, so it is possible. Sometimes you just have to suck-it-up and put yourself out there because if you really want to enjoy your time you are the only one responsible for the experience you have there.

LA
23 Jun, 2021 11:59 AM

I get what you mean. College isn't the same as if you were in highschool, where now you're probably swarmed with alot of people from different walks of life.

You picture college to be like throwing an all out wild party 24/7 spring break style, but hey college is also a place you prepare for your career. You've got involved in a few clubs, that's good. You still don't have much friends maybe cus it's hard to find "like-minded" people around campus,. But i'm sure they're out there, you'll find clues what kind of things they like or their point of views so pay attention and don't let the fish go whenever you come across those people you know you're comfortable being around with or you want to meet. I think once you have that "group" of like-minded reliable people, it should feel your "missing" void.

I don't think you need to make too many "best friends" as i don't see that's a neccessary or a safe thing to do, but having alot of "acquaintances" is a good idea because those are gonna be your networks you will need after you graduate. Plus, I think the people you meet in college are gonna be more reliable and given the special circumstances in college now you get more time to see who they are, than if you just meet some random people in society when you're in your 30's.

CA
23 Jun, 2021 12:00 PM

While you are in college, remember in the beginning you are an adolescent and most of the time, it normally happens that when you complete your college you are no longer 'in teen', you become a prudent confident young person-ready for participation in life's real struggle for survival/existence. I suggest that you must have friends who ought to be sincere and faithful & you surely be a person of alike nature. You should win the heart of seniors without loosing your self- esteem because they will surely help in your hour of need.(Remember-honesty, sincerity, and due respect at both ends). Friendship between opposite sexes sometimes cause pandemonium in life and sour results put both you and your family members in awful awkward state. So, it is always better to act prudently, intelligently and keep all " The Good. The Bad, and The Ugly" in mind. You can have a joyful stay at College only if you carefully listen to mind and be 'alert' when the heart starts speaking differently. I must say that even heart is not always to be blamed. The real thing is your power of judgment. I don't mean to say that one should become unimpassioned, unfaithful to one's inner feelings, or to be known as 'so called backward'. The gist of my views is stay prudent always till you complete college and pass out with flying colours. Remember you can continue with this kind of attitude even even in post college life too. Best of luck & take care